he is risen..indeed

my voice was completely gone for three days..it returned on wednesday. i was home alone and thought to try talking...which feels realy strange, i assure you...to be testing your talking skills while home alone. when i attempted and actually thought i was speaking, i was sure i must have been mistaken..after those three days of silence..so i called my mom and said "can you hear me?!" and she assured me i was actaully speaking quite clearly, to my own surprise.

so..with voice in check, i was able to work on my singing at our wednesday evening choir rehearsal with the easter orchestra. i found that i had not yet gained all of my voice..but the lower parts of my range..and in soft portions. so i sang about half of the time and praticed animated lipsync in case i would need it at my upcomming performances.

by friday, though..i was back in full swing and was able to sing the whole of our easter portion of handels messsiah without issue. the concert did go notably well, dispite a few hicups in the execution.

saturday morning we had another church choir rehearsal in which i was all of my voice to use in practicing..and tonight is our evensong performance.

i havent appreciated my voice so much in years...and for that i AM thankful. i have come to love singing even the pieces from these concerts that i was very un-fond of previously.
it is very humbling as a singer to have your song taken from you..and what have i done to deserve that it is returned to me? is it mine to have? is it mine to use? no. and so i hope to never forget that it is his to have and to use and to take when he pleases...i am simply the instrument through with the song is played.

added:
today it is raining. it began last night just before midnight and has continued since. i cannot ever remember a past easter which was filled with rain...yet...it seems perfect. this isnt about your cute new white shoes and bright clothes..this is about death of one man with power remove all trace of stain from your record. thats more powerful than any amount of rainfall...this rain is the cleansing..and this rain is tears.