2:05PM
"i wanna dance...i wanna move around the room just like a woman in a trance..."

last night at my church groups' christmas party held in a beautiful old house with marvelous flooring and molded walls in the older downtown area of augusta we learned to swing dance..mostly shag. it was the most enjoyable party i can remember, realy.

dancing made me realise a lot of things about myself and many other women in our culture that carry into life away from the dancefloor..well..i already knew them, but it showed them to me again in a light i hadnt realised.

first of all, the guys ask the girls to dance..the girls wait.
that in itself, is a marvelously freeing feeling for me as a woman, though i know the concept takes a lot of guts for some guys.

further into the night, when my partner, jonathan, and i were being shown a new step..chad, who was teaching us, had to keep getting onto me for trying to lead. i realised that through most of the night up till that point, i'd been trying to lead these men through the steps as i could remember them..instead of letting them do their job as the male dancer.
i know that i do this all throughout my life..lead when i should let men lead in things. my friend, daly, helps me realise this constantly by practically running over me or beating me up if i dont wait for him to open doors. (men, take note...learn to do this insistantly for the ladies you spend time with)

i think dancing..real dancing..should be a bigger part of growing up (as in, where i am now in life) i didnt understand that till last night. not only does it teach me what it means to follow, it teaches you to be a bit more confident and carefree about who's watching, because its just that much fun.


*added sunday evening*
10:05PM
further thoughts on dancing...

my always wanting to lead is similar to our relationship with God.
yes, i can live life leading myself and hoping god will follow, but its a lot more fun and freemoving if i just relax and look to him for direction. thats EXACTLY how it works with dancing. sometimes i had no idea what jonathan wanted to do next, but i just went with whatever direction he turned me and we did some pretty amazing things.