it amazes me how easy it is to waste a day away doing unimportant things. it also amazes me how much one can fill a day with that seems at least a little bit more important. thats what this week has been about.
i'm sort of back but mostly not.
before i took this break, i came to realise that i spend entirely too much time reading about life through the internet instead of living life.
i talk about how i've wanted to read certain books or write more or play music more or know people more...instead of going out and doing it.
this past week i let those tables turn and i learned that even when i allow myself to enjoy these things instead of only wasting time talking about them, i still cant find enough time for all of them. and even then, i let these rarely experienced things take the time slots of even greater treasures...like studying scriptures or realy experiencing personal prayer.
i've been using this time to reawaken my love for creativity, for thought, for expression, for order in my life.
my room is becomming clean and my bed has been made almost daily, i'm starting to actually read books again that i've looked at on the shelf for months, i've been writing and playing my guitar frequently, I've been considering scriptures and thinking about them throughout the day, i've been spending time with people whom i cherish and talking about struggles and joys and frustrations. i even ballanced my checkbook this afternoon.
I miss using the internet to connect with friends i've lost any other form of direct contact to...but more than that, i miss the life it took from me. I've lost too much, missed too much, forgotten too much.
So now I'm making up for lost time.
I must now sleep before life begins again tomorrow.
tell me about your days (coffeegirl@silver-lined.com)
Tuesday, October 28, 2003
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